over

1.7.13
On friday of last week he said he wanted to meet this wed. the 9th.  I actually considered it.  This a.m. I sent him a text that I was looking forward to it ... he said he couldn't.  I sent a couple of texts in the a.m. about his interest in keeping this up. Texted me back he got his ass handed to him... busy. He finally responded that he didn't know if he wanted to, that it can accomplish nothing other than heartache.  I wrote back no heartache from me, wanted to keep it light/fluffy/fool around... felt something was different.  He wrote back that he didn't want to fool around and plate is full.  I told him I got it and asked what he wanted from me.  Said just my friendship. I wrote back asking what had changed in a few days.  I said I would miss him if he didn't wanna talk anyore and that he did mean the world to me. Said he needed to concentrate on being a better person/my relationship/my future and that he didnt wanna be.  I asked what he didn't wanna be ... that he didn't wanna be someone who meant the world to me?  He said he can't be my world.  I said, figure of speech. That he meant a lot to me and I will miss him and that I honestly thought I meant something to him too but that reality is reality and I won't forget this past year.  He said that no matter when this happened it was going to happen. No easy way about it and I will truly miss you.  Last thing I said was that this sucks ass and I did think he'd be in my life in some form and that I hate that he won't be.

So that's it.  I know we've been dancing around this since Oct... but why do you tell me you're happy to have me in your life one day then pull the rug out the next.  It's done.

There are no more texts . 2012, this story is over. =(